RICH man, POOR woman

Septermber 8th, 2008

As most of you know I am on Eharmony again. I was matched with a 40 year old. Damn, that sounds old, doesn't it? Well to put things into perspective, 30 sounds old and that is my age.
Anywho, we did the whole communication thing. I saw his photos. Good looking man. In a lot of the pictures you saw HUGE houses in the back ground. Like one, he is on the deck of the house and these HUGE McMansions are in the back. That's fine and dandy.
I called him last night. This was our first phone call. On the call he tells me things - not bragging but very matter of fact. He has boats. He has the McMansion in the picture - found that out by what part of town he lives in. He has multiple cars. HE HAS MONEY.
YEAH! I met a man that has money.
CRAP! I met a man that has money.
I have no money. I have no money. Yes, I am credit card debt free. However I do not have savings. I am living paycheck to paycheck. I do not have the fancy clothes. I do not have the money to get a bikini wax and get my hair "did" every month. I do not have the fancy toys. Dude, I need a new fridge and I can not buy one yet.
I felt inferior. He never asked me about my financial situation, he never asked me how much money I made ... nothing like that came up. I made myself feel inferior because I know my situation and I heard some of his.
He asked me out on a date. We decided on a lunch date.
I don't know if I want to go because how can a RICH man want a POOR woman like me?
And when did I start to think of myself as poor?

Help me Rhonda

September 4th, 2008
Help me Rhonda! Help help me Rhonda!
Holy Hot Shit Bat Man! My sex drive came back. With a force. From out of no where!!! I do not think it has ever been this strong. I mean I had nothing for some time now.It is strong! It is powerful! It has used too many batteries ... poor BOB (battery operated boyfriend).
I was not in a rush or a real need to find a man. Now I kinda am. He is gonna be one happy camper!
Is this how a man thinks? Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex. Sex. More sex. Poor, poor BOB.

Ostrich Syndrome

August 2008
Can I just bury my head? I am getting these forward emails from my friends about how they became a couple with their man. Am I the ONLY single woman I know? Oh my word ... am I?
I sent a message back to STOP sending me the emails. I don't want to hear about their happiness. The response back? "Oh Darling Nikki, have fun with it". So after thinking about it I was like ... I'm game.
This is my email Darling Nikki style:
1. What are your first names? Darling Nikki & Mr Perfect
2. How long have you been together? a lifetime
3. How long did you know each other before you started dating? We meet on the 1st and were dating on the 2nd and married on the 3rd
4. Who asked who out? he did
5. How old are each of you/were you?I was 30, he was 27
6. What are your astrological signs? Pisces and whatever sign matches Pisces the best
7. How tall are each of you? I am 5'0 he is 5'9
8. Who's mother do you see the most? Mine
9. Who’s siblings do you see the most? his
10. Do you have any children together? We have 2, the most beautiful precious children ever. I do also have my daughter, her father died in a freak accident and Mr Perfect adopted her .. so really I have 3 of the most beautiful precious children ever.
11. What about pets? yes
12. If so, what kind? a cat, a dog, horses, ponies, birdies, a peacock, some mice named Jack & Gus Gus, deer ... wow, the list can go on and on
13. Which bill is the hardest on you as a couple? none, he makes a ton of money
14. How do each of you work? I am a stay at home mom and he does his Mr Perfect business
15. Is that what you went to school for? no
16. Did you go to the same school? no
17. Are you from the same hometown? no
18. Are you from the same hometown now? what kind of question is this? Mr Perfect & I live in a cottage in Hawaii. We also have a home in Italy shaped like a boot, a house in the mountains in Colorado, a log cabin in Maine, a mansion in Switzerland, a castle in Ireland ... really I think we need to downsize.
9. Who is the smartest? depends on the topic
20. Who is the most sensitive? me
17. What is your type of date restaurant??? any 4 star or the place around the corner that looks scary from the outside but has THE BEST food ever.
18. Where could be a place you could drag him to to shop with you? We have personal shoppers.
19. Where is the furthest you have traveled as a couple? Well we ARE going to the Moon next month.
21. Who is the most sexual? Tie. We have sex all the time.
22. Who has the best group of friends? All of our friends are wonderful. That includes you too!
23. Who has the craziest exes? Well since my daughter's father died in a freak accident we do not have any crazy Exs.
24. Who has the worst temper? Neither, we are Mr and Mrs Perfect

Did ya like that?? I was pretty proud of myself.
EHarmony is going OK. I have made it to open communication several times and then to phone calls a few. There is nothing to "write home about" so far. Where is my Mr Perfect for now?
Still no sex drive. However I am happy. I am really happy and I'm having a lot of fun.

Going once, going twice ...

June 2008-July 2008
Who will I date next? I am signed up for EHarmony. I have high hopes for this. I am ready to meet a man I have chemistry with. They seem so few and far between. It is not an automatic thing for me. I have not felt that chemistry in such a long time. Will it ever show itself again? I am disappointed in the number of matches on EHarmony. There are very few. Am I that hard to pair up with?
Oh but here is one ... right here, right here, right here!
I sent him questions.
He responded right back. Hey! He must be online!
I answered his questions and sent more.
He responded right back! Oh!! Be still my heart. It's beating like crazy.
I write. He writes back. Again. And again! We complete the entire communication within 10 minutes!
It's time for open communication.
I am SOOOO excited! <insert hand claps>
I ask him questions. He replies back!! With answers. hmm. I sent another with more questions. He replies back! Just answers again. Dude! Don't you know you need to ask a woman questions??!!!! Show some freakin interest!!
I wanted to write that. I did not.
OK, this one is a dud. Crap.
I decided to change my search radius from 5 miles to 60 miles.
Oh my word! I was going from 4 new matches a week to 20 a day! This is gonna be fun!

Waste of time with Mr T

April 2008 - June 2008.
I'm ready. Can you hear me roar?
One big thing has occurred since I last wrote. I lost my sex drive. Gone. Nothing. No desire to even use BOB (battery operated boyfriend). I LOVED BOB! However he sits in his drawer oh so quiet. Not a sound. I am not worried about this for I was not ready to date. I am ready now but I am OK with the no sex drive. It shall come back.
So my friends know I am single and ready to go. One hears my plea to set me up on a blind date.
I shall call him Mr T.
So you remember Mr T? He had all the gold around his neck ... my Mr T did not have the gold around his neck but spent money like crazy and bitched about how he had no money. DUH!
However he was nice.
We went out on several dates. I moved to a new house in May and he helped me move in. What a trooper!
Other than that, there was nothing. I think I continued to go out with him to waste time. To laugh at what a goof ball he was.
I had no desire to kiss Mr T. I had no desire to hug Mr T.
I let him go.
I think I shall try EHarmony. Isn't that to bring me my soul mate. My perfect match??

I'm not ready

Early May 2007
Latest news? Mr Hottie called me and brought up the fact he was dating others. This I knew. He said he had something to tell me. He has gone exclusive with another. He is sorry. He really likes me but things progressed faster with the other lady.
I laughed. I am OK with this. I am not ready to date. This was a relief.
I told him it was nice knowing him. Good Luck with everything & take care.
Time to take care of myself so I will be ready next time.
I canceled all dating web sites.