game plan with dating

November 9th, 2008
I love game plans. I must be very goal oriented.
OK. The current status is I am still dealing with Mr P. I am not over him. I have been told by many to follow my gut. My gut tells me to believe him. In truth this makes me feel better about myself.
I wrote a long email last night to him. Yelling at him. Asking him what kind of person bails when life gets stressful. I just wrote it like I was talking to him. Lots of yelling. hehe. Regardless one line was "If it really is true and you can not cope at this time, then what I just did by sending you this email is the worst thing I could do to you." I did not send the email. It's sitting in my drafts.
I wrote it about 8PM last night. I felt so much better about everything. I got the last word in and "called him out" without him knowing. I am not going to wait for him but if he calls me or writes me I would have a talk with him regarding this and I would give him another chance.
Oh and Melissa S, thank you for being my text saver. I was able to send you such off the wall texts and you accepted them for what they were. Thank you so much.
I decided to renew my eHarmony account for another 3 months. It now ends the end of February. I also decided to sign up on Plenty of Fish - got that idea from a Single over 30s group on CafeMom. Within minutes I had emails & IM requests. I am not down with the IM but I said yes to one. It was a fun conversation and it cheered me up more.
I am going to go full force with dating others. I will contact everyone that meets my BASIC requirements (not to far away, has a job, wants kids, knows I have my daughter, non smoker, no drugs, NOT MARRIED) and run with it.
I may contact Mr P in December to see how he is. I feel this is what I should do. If he was honest I should give him another shot. I am figuring December because I know one major issue will be resolved by then. I set a tickler for that date so I will not be thinking about it daily. My gut tells me he was being honest. My gut is also telling me to get out there JUST IN CASE he was being honest but he is still broken.
GUT (I say to myself) please do not screw with me on this! I have a game plan and I am working on it. I like the fact I did a tickler so if I do meet someone and I am into them then I will not do anything about it. I will smile and say "Darling Nikki, thank your Gut". Either way, I think this is the right thing for me.
So I am off to surf Plenty of fish. Hmmm, you over there, how you are doing?